


All's well that ends well

by Wildrivver



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Asexual Enjolras, Asexuality, Combeferre Knows Everything, Coming Out, Enjolras Has Feelings, First Kiss, Happy Ending, M/M, Self-Discovery, Supportive Grantaire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:00:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23874325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wildrivver/pseuds/Wildrivver
Summary: Enjolras just needs a moment to figure out his feelings for Grantaire. Luckily Combeferre is on hand to help.
Relationships: Enjolras/Grantaire (Les Misérables)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 98





	All's well that ends well

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time posting anything in this fandom. It’s been a long time, I feel very rusty. 
> 
> This was a moment I had to cut from a much longer piece that I am writing but I loved it so much that I reworked it into it’s own little sorry. I hope you enjoyed it.

Enjolras slammed the door closed, wishing he could shut out the whole world. He didn’t want to deal with any of it. By the time Combeferre arrived downstairs to see what the commotion was, Enjolras was restlessly pacing back and forth across the living room, so absorbed in his own thoughts he hadn’t even taken his jacket off.

“Is everything OK?” Combeferre asked cautiously, unsure of what he was walking into. He began searching his brain to see if there had been anything in the news that day to warrant such a reaction from Enjolras but came up empty. Enjolras finally collapsed on the sofa with a heavy sigh.

“I fucked it up!” He exclaimed, hiding his head in his hands.

Combeferre sat down next to him. “Fucked what up?”

“This was such a bad idea and now I’ve lead him on. I should have just said no when he asked me out. Sure it would have hurt him, but that would have been better than this.” Enjolras let out a groan as his brain replayed the dreadful moment over and over again for him.

Combeferre shuffled closer and put a hand on his friends shoulder, still at a loss as to what had happened and so unable to find a solution and help. “What happened?” he asked.

“I don’t want to talk about it. I’m such an idiot.”

“OK, I understand if it’s too much right now, but if you were to tell me what happened, maybe I can help. It might feel good to let it out rather than bottling it all up until later.” Enjolras looked up at his closest friend, hearing sense in his words. He was probably right, he usually was. Enjolras had learned from experience that when Combeferre told him to slow down and take a breath, he should. He leaned back into the sofa and looked up at the ceiling so that he wouldn’t have to see Combeferre while he spoke.

“Everything was going great,” he began, with a small smile, remembering how happy he had been earlier that evening. “Grantaire cooked, and he’s a great cook by the way. Did you know that? You probably did. Anyway, we ate and then we were just sitting talking when...when Grantaire leaned over and kissed me.” He suddenly fell silent.

“And?” Combeferre asked gently.

Enjolras closed his eyes and gritted his teeth. “And I pushed him away so hard I fell of my chair.” There was pain in his voice as he spoke, pain to match what he had seen in Grantaire’s eyes in that moment. Enjolras waited for Combeferre’s judgment but it didn’t come.

“Was it because he caught you by surprise?” He asked.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“And then what happened?”

“I left, obviously. How could I stay after that?” He opened his eyes for answers and saw Combeferre watching him with sympathy. “I’ve fucked up, haven’t I? I told you I shouldn’t have said yes. I just don’t know what I’m doing.”

“No one really does.”

“No but, I _really_ don’t. Can I talk to you about something?” he asked. He just needed someone to confide in, a friend to help him sort out the mess inside his head, but he would understand if this was getting a bit too much for Combeferre. He didn’t want to burden him with all of his problems. Perhaps what he really needed was to see a therapist.

“You know you can always talk to me about anything,” Combeferre insisted. At some point Enjolras had pulled a cushion to his chest. He bit his lip as he looked down at it, wondering where to start. He didn’t know how to put into words thoughts that he himself didn’t understand. Where should he even begin?

“I’m gay,” he finally said.

“I think the whole world knows that by now,” Combeferre allowed himself a small laugh to break the tension. Enjolras also smiled a little, after all he was the out and proud leader of an LQBTQ+ rights activist group and wanted everyone to know it.

“I’m gay,” Enjolras continued with a little more confidence. “But I’ve never been with anyone.” He felt his cheeks flush as he admitted it, this wasn’t something he was comfortable talking about, even with his best friend. “I’ve never dated, been in a relationship, had a boyfriend or done...anything. I have plenty of excuses, it’s never the right time, I need to concentrate on my education, I’m too busy with the ABC, but the truth is, any time a guy showed any interest in me, my gut instinct is to run a mile. The thought is terrifying; I don’t know what I’m meant to do, or what they expect. So I just avoid those types of situations. I’ve always told myself I’m content with what I have, all my amazing friends.” He looked up to smile at Combeferre and found him still listening intently. “But then there’s...” he paused again.

“Grantaire?” Combeferre prompted.

“Grantaire,” Enjolras sighed, sinking down lower. He was curled in on himself now, his boots resting on the sofa cushion unnoticed. I don’t know what it is I’m feeling but I do feel _something_ for him. It wasn’t there to begin with but it’s grown, the more time I’ve spent with him, the more I learn about him. It’s become that I want to spend all my time with him.”

Combeferre took of his glasses and began to clean them. Enjolras wondered if he had picked the moment intentionally so that he would be able to react to his next question without being seen. He was so short sighted Enjolras would be nothing but a blur without them.

“Have you considered that you might be asexual?”

Enjolras frowned. “No,” he said, that couldn’t be it. He had known that he was gay since he was fourteen. But he had also never stopped to think if he might be ace. He knew about the asexual and aromatic spectrum so if he were ace or aro he would just know, right?

“Hear me out,” Combeferre continued to meticulously clean his glasses. “I’m not trying to diagnose you or put a label on you, only you can know who you are and how you identify, but it might be worth thinking about. It’s a wide spectrum and there are many ways to feel attraction, all of them valid. I just thought that it might help you to understand your feelings for Grantaire and what you might want from a relationship with him.” He put his glasses back on. “I’m going to put the kettle on, would you like one?”

Enjolras gratefully accepted the offer and the easy transition from a difficult topic of conversation. Combeferre was going to make a great doctor one day; he had a way of effortlessly putting people at ease. He hauled himself up from the sofa and retreated up to his room clutching a steaming mug of tea.

After changing into his pyjamas, he found himself lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling and thinking about what Combeferre had said. The more he thought about it, the more he realised that Combeferre might have noticed something that he himself had been oblivious to. It might explain his general fear of entering into a relationship and the way he had reacted when Grantaire had leaned over and kissed him.

As a teenager he had always been bemused by the way his friends talked about people they had crushes on, or about sex. According to Courfeyrac it seemed to be the be all and end all of human existence. Sure, some people were attractive, but he couldn’t help thinking everyone was exaggerating. He had imagined that if he ever dated someone, things would progress in their inevitable direction until eventually he would just have to go through with it and hopefully it wouldn’t be too awful. It sounded so awkward and uncomfortable and he wouldn’t have been surprised to discover that good sex was a conspiracy theory that the world had bought into.

But as he had gotten older and he managed to avoid any scenario that might lead someone to believing he was interested in them, he realised it was fine. He didn’t need to date and he didn’t need to have sex and it was kind of messed up that at one point in his life he might have made himself do something that he clearly didn’t want to do. He had his friends and he was content. He stopped worrying about it and no one brought it up, so it had faded from his memory. Any fantasies he may have had since were able to exist detached from reality.

However as he lay on his bed thinking about that moment with Grantaire, all his thoughts and fears from earlier in his life flooded back to him. He hadn’t known about asexuality back then, he had just assumed that everyone felt like he did, but no one would admit to it. Realisation was suddenly dawning on him. But then what about his feelings for Grantaire?

He wasn’t a teenager anymore; he knew that if sex wasn’t something a person wanted they _definitely_ didn’t have to have it. But what about other things? He realised that he had never so much as paused to think about any other aspect which might come with dating or a relationship if you just took sex out of the equation. All of a sudden he desperately wanted to explore those possibilities, but again his thoughts returned to Grantaire. He apparently had plenty of experience in the field, if his boasting at meeting was to be believed. He wasn’t going to want to stick around while Enjolras figured out what he wanted, not once he found out sex was off the table and especially not after how he had pushed him away.

There was a knock at his door. “Come in,” he sighed.

Combeferre opened the door a crack. “I just wanted to make sure you’re ok.”

“Yeah, I think so,” he replied. “It turns out I have a lot to think about and I need to talk to Grantaire. What am I even going to say to him?”

“He texted me by the way.”

“He did?” Enjolras sat up, wondering why he had texted Combeferre and not himself. “I bet he’s though with me.”

“No, you left in such a rush that you forgot your phone. He asked if you were ok. I hope you don’t mind, but I told him that you wanted him to know you were sorry.”

“I am,” he agreed, and found that he was grateful for Combeferre replying without asking, he would probably have gone into meltdown trying to decide which words he should use to apologise. But he couldn’t just leave it at that, Grantaire was probably beside himself wondering what he’d done wrong, when he hadn’t done anything, just tried to be cute. It had been cute, right up until his freak out. “Can you send him another text? Can you say that I still want to give this a shot and if he wants to he can come over here tomorrow morning and I’ll try and explain. That way he’s the one who can leave if he needs to. Only, can you think of a better way to word that?”

“Trust me, he’s not going to want to leave you, but I’ll do my best to pass the message on. Now how about we make pancakes and watch some TV.” Enjolras nodded and followed Combeferre to the kitchen. Later, he nodded off on the sofa, wrapped in a blanket and watching a wildlife documentary that Combeferre had picked, trying not to think about what he was going to say to Grantaire.

At some point in the night Combeferre guided him to bed, but he didn’t sleep well and woke up much too early. Which had lead to him drinking too much coffee and now he couldn’t sit still .He should have told Grantaire a time to come over but he hadn’t. Combeferre had gone out to give them some privacy and so he had no way to contact him. He paced back and forth, looking out the window at everyone passing on the street.

He jumped at the sound of the door bell.

He opened the door to Grantaire. He looking like he had gotten about as much sleep as Enjolras had. There were dark circles under his eyes and he was wearing the same clothes as the day before, he might have slept in them. Enjolras invited him in. He took his coat off and sat down on the sofa.

“I’m sorry,” Enjolras said, still on his feet, unsure of whether to sit next to Grantaire or across from him.

“No, I should be sorry,” Grantaire said, his voice quiet and cracked. “I should have asked first, or realised that you’re just not that into me.”

“What?” Enjolras sat down next to Grantaire.

“I should have realised that you only agreed to go out with me out of pity, but I guess I’d wanted it for so long I wasn’t thinking straight. Of cause you don’t like me like that.”

Enjolras took Grantaire’s hand to stop him from talking. He hated that Grantaire had been thinking such things about himself and that it was _his_ fault. “I _did_ want to go out with you,” Enjolras said, lacing their fingers together. “I...I still do. I’m sorry I reacted so badly.” Grantaire went very still, holding his breath as he waited for Enjolras to continue. “I didn’t know why I acted like that, but when I got back here I talked to Combeferre and he helped me figure it out.” He kept his eyes on their joined hands. Grantaire’s finger nails were worn and broken in places, with traces of paint still clinging where he hadn’t cleaned it away. His skin felt rough but his palm was soft and warm and growing a little sweaty. He thought he might even be able to feel his pulse, which was quickening as he spoke, but that might have been his own.

“I think I’m asexual.” He said, and then continued to explain before Grantaire could say anything. “I do like you, and I would like to keep dating you, but I think I panicked a bit last night because...because I’ve never kissed anyone, and I didn’t know what it meant and there are things that I’m not comfortable with.” He didn’t know what he was expecting to happen when he said those words out loud but he realised belatedly that a part of him though Grantaire might get up and leave the same way he had the night before. But Grantaire was still here, his hand tightly gripping his. He looked up and was surprised to see Grantaire smiling at him with that insufferable smirk of his.

“You like me,” he repeated. “And you want to keep dating.” A mischievous gleam had returned to his green eyes. Enjolras felt a weight of worry lift from him.

“Yes,” Enjolras said and dared to smile back. “If you still want to.”

“If _I_ still want to?” Grantaire laughed. “Enjolras I have dreamed of you saying those worlds for a long time. I want to be with you in whatever form that may take. We can figure this out together and we don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with. I promise, I’ll never try and kiss you again if you don’t want me to.”

Enjolras had been elated hearing Grantaire’s support right up until that last point. The thought of never kissing Grantaire made him deeply sad. He realised he wanted to kiss him. But not in the way he’d seem in movies. It wasn't an urge simply to be given into. He had a deep affection for this man and in that moment he wanted to kiss him. He found his eyes drawn once again to Grantaire’s lips.

Grantaire had stopped talking and was looking at him strangely, although he suspected he was the one with the strange look on his face. With a sudden confidence he leaned forward and cupping Grantaire’s rough cheek in his palm and laid a soft kiss on his slightly parted lips. They were chapped and he could feel the prickle of stubble against his skin. Grantaire stilled, almost frozen in place. He pulled back but moved his hand to Grantaire’s neck, letting his fingertips brushing into his hair.

“Is this ok?” He asked. Grantaire took a shaky breath then gave a small nod. Smiling he kissed him again. He hasn't known what to expect, but he was surprised by the intimacy of it, by the vulnerability and trust. He wasn't sure if that's what other people felt when they kissed and he wasn't sure if he wanted it to go any further then this soft yet deeply sincere display of his affection, but for now this was enough. Grantaire let him lead and remained mostly still apart from bringing his hand to rest lightly on Enjolras’s leg, light enough that he could still easily pull away if he wished.

“So kissing’s ok?” Grantaire asked when he sat back.

“Yes,” Enjolras smiled. “More than ok.” Grantaire’s face lit up.

They fell back into comfortable conversation and as weariness set in due to their shared lack of sleep they curled up on the sofa and turned on the TV. Enjolras shifted closer to Grantaire and let his head rest of his shoulder. Grantaire wrapped his arm around him and held him close.

When Combeferre returned from his errands, the house was quiet except for the sound of the TV. He stepped softly into the living room and found Enjolras and Grantaire asleep together on the sofa. Enjolras had his face busied in Grantaire’s chest and Grantaire had his arms around him, almost protectively. The wildlife documentary he had put on the night before for Enjolras was playing in the back ground.

Taking care not to disturb them, he lifted the blanket off the back of the sofa and laid it over them so that they wouldn’t get cold. Then he tip toed out of the room.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. If you enjoyed it please consider leaving a comment or kudos.


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